


I dreamed you dreamed of me

by mkhhhx



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Cycling dates, Developing Relationship, Domestic Fluff, First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, Firsts, Friends to Lovers, Jeno's oral fixation makes a guest appearance, M/M, Making Out, Smoking, Smut, Soft boys being soft, and a lot in love, jaemin being a little dumb, renjun is done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:08:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27671125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mkhhhx/pseuds/mkhhhx
Summary: “It’s been what, two years now? Three?”“Since...what?”“Since you two have been crushing on each other, silly.”“I did not have a c—” Jaemin starts to complain, because it’s not true and even if it was true Donghyuck wouldn’t have the right to know. Probably.“You’re both helpless idiots,” Donghyuck pinches his cheek. “Don’t fuck this up.”
Relationships: Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Comments: 50
Kudos: 511





	I dreamed you dreamed of me

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!   
> FInally my fist fic for one of my dearest ships, I hope you all enjoy lots <3  
> Title from Years&Years - King
> 
> Many thanks to [mashie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeekiies/pseuds/yeekiies) for betaing!

It happens on an otherwise inconspicuous morning. It’s early enough for the dorm to be still quiet, yet late enough for the sun to have risen, casting the first rays of sunlight through the half-shut blinds and warming the room up.

Jaemin wakes up first, careful to limit his movement to a minimum. Jeno is still all over him — a warm, comforting weight where his arm drapes over Jaemin’s waist. There’s no reason to wake up early, none other than purely out of habit, and they don’t have any early schedules so Jaemin lets himself doze off again in that comfortable state between awake and asleep. Jeno’s bed is exactly the same as his own, yet he always seems to be more well rested when he sneaks there in the middle of the night instead of staying in his own room. Maybe he’s lonely, maybe a warm body next to his own is something he really needs. Looking back at that morning after months he might figure it out, that what he needs is specifically Jeno.

“Awake?” Jeno mutters, three minutes or three hours after Jaemin first woke up. Jeno’s face is half-hidden in the crook of Jaemin’s neck and his hair, red now, is a mess atop his head. Jaemin brings a hand out of the covers to tame it, endeared with how Jeno inches close to the touch and shuts his eyes.

“We don’t have to move,” Jaemin reminds him. “We only have to practice late in the afternoon.”

One more of their usual mornings when they aren’t rushing in and out of the shower and down to the company cars. Jisung or Renjun are the first ones to wake up usually, pattering around the kitchen and chatting. Sometimes, when neither them nor 127 have schedules Donghyuck visits around noon to join for late breakfast. Mark used to be around a lot too but they don’t expect him anymore, his visits rare and pleasant surprises.

Up to that point their morning is going according to protocol. They might play around on the bed for a bit until one kicks the other down and then they’ll be heading to the bathroom, greeting whoever is in the kitchen or living room, life moving on in its boring daily ways. But it doesn’t. What happens, instead, is that Jeno looks up at him like he’s on the verge of saying something. Knowing they are too close for awkward stares and silences, Jaemin looks back at him lifting an eyebrow, playful. Maybe Jeno is just hungry and dozing off again; happens.

“What’s up?” Jaemin smiles, hand still tangled in Jeno’s hair, caressing the hay-like strands mindlessly. “Want to sleep a little more?”

Jeno keeps staring, with a gaze like when he’s focusing too hard, learning a new choreography, working on lyrics, figuring if he can lift a little more that day at the gym. It’s like time freezes as Jaemin is waiting for an answer and he’s not really concerned, but his curiosity grows.

“Can I kiss you?” Jeno asks, voice hoarse and too small and Jaemin feels how he curls up into himself under the covers.

“What?” The question comes out of Jaemin’s mouth before he can think and it obviously scares Jeno although neither of them move. But it’s warm and comfortable and Jeno looks like he wants to run away and Jaemin knows he has to fix this, whatever it is. “Yeah,” he mutters, somewhat in a daze. “Yeah, you can kiss me.”

Jeno stays frozen only for a moment. Then Jaemin shuts his eyes and feels every little thing — Jeno lifting himself on his elbow to hover a few inches above him, Jeno leaning in slowly, painfully so, like he has been thinking about this for too long and he’s starting to have regrets. And then there are Jeno’s lips on his own, cold and dry, leaving the softest of pecks on Jaemin’s before they are gone again.

“You can forget this,” Jeno says a little later, when they are still on the same bed next to each other, both on their backs, both ignoring the elephant in the room. “It was nothing.”

***

Things don’t change, not in a way that others can see. Jaemin is his usual self, not afraid to be everything from cringey to greasy or get handsy with other members on screen for the various shit they film. Then he returns home and leaves his mask by the door. Exhaustion is a friend after years in the industry, a friend because it means he’s finally safe and out of the range of the cameras, he can be moody, he can curl into himself on the couch and not talk to anyone for hours until Jisung will show up and let Jaemin lean on him. They rely on themselves to be their best versions and they rely on each other to stay sane when the cameras stop rolling. A kiss could never shatter his friendship with Jeno, built in almost a decade, so it doesn’t. They go wild on skinship for the fans on screen and they play video games together at the dorm and they always wait for each other to finish practice, even when they have different schedules. Jeno sneaks in his bed late at night and Jaemin does the same. They don’t talk about the kiss and maybe there’s no reason to and if Jaemin is analysing his and Jeno’s every interaction under a new light, that’s on him and nobody else.

“What are you doing here?” Jaemin walks towards the two slouching forms sitting at the rooftop of the dorms. He needed some fresh air to clean his thoughts and maybe some alone time, but it seems like they beat him to it.

“Nothing,” Chenle shrugs, kicking an empty plastic chair towards Jaemin.

“You’re stressed,” Donghyuck muses. Always too perceptive for his own good and it’s not a conversation Jaemin wants or can have. They are all stressed, literally all the time, but Jaemin knows Donghyuck can see beyond this, right through him.

“Did you steal that from Johnny?” Jaemin nods towards the small pack resting on Donghyuck’s thighs. The rooftop is full of discarded cigarettes and the managers know. As long as nothing is on camera nobody cares.

“Was almost empty,” Donghyuck takes a long drag out of his own and hands the pack to Jaemin, a cheap lighter inside. “Merely did him a favor by finishing it off.”

Jaemin leans back and lights up the stick between his lips. Knows Jeno would probably throw a judgemental look their way if they saw it, but wouldn’t say anything. But Jeno isn’t there. He’s just in Jaemin’s thoughts, all of the damn time.

“Wanna talk about it?” Chenle asks, all three of them staring at the city skyline. Chenle is staying at the dorm for the night and Donghyuck doesn’t have an early schedule, so he’s probably spending the night too. They are good at ignoring the Mark shaped missing piece in their dorm and in their lives or how he’s at the other side of the globe, barely ever messaging them anymore. It wears Donghyuck down more than anyone, but they ignore it anyway, shove it under the rag along with all of their issues they are too busy to properly take care of.

“No,” Jaemin says drily. He wants to, wants to ask what the hells is happening, wants to be comforted by his friends, but he knows he can’t talk without outing Jeno and he won’t do this.

“Okay,” Chenle nods. And when they finish all the cigarettes in Johnny’s pack, they stare at the dim sky for as long as they can; until one of their managers calls to ask where they are. To remind them that their time and space is limited and their freedom is a little more than a joke.

***

When Jaemin enters the gym space he is greeted by Jaehyun, more sweat than clothes on the rowing machine, sending a wave his way. Jaemin doesn’t work out much when they are not preparing for a comeback or a tour, but he’s familiar with the private gym nonetheless. Familiar with Jeno’s favorite exercises too. He finds what he’s looking for at the far end of the spacious room, relieved that Jaehyun is too far to hear anything they might say over the sound of rowing and the constant growl of the air condition and the music playing from Jaehyun’s speakers.

“Hey,” he sits on the bench the closest to where Jeno is lifting weights. Decides that making small talk will only stress Jeno. “I’m here to talk.”

Jeno lifts the bar again and secures it, sitting upright and lifting his shirt to dry the sweat off his face.”Talk?”

“Yeah,” Jaemin had a plan. The gym is usually quiet enough so that people wouldn’t bother them. He had managed to put his thoughts in order.

“About what?” Jeno knows. He is stressed nonetheless, eyes crinkling but not in his usual, friendly way.

“What happened,” Jaemin has trouble actually saying it. _When you kissed me_. “I didn’t hate it.”

“You didn’t hate it,” Jeno echoes and his body language screams that his flight response has been activated. “Okay.”

“We should talk about it.” They have had their fair share of serious talks over the years. Barely fought. Jaemin was confident in their ability to work it out again.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” Jeno looks at Jaehyun who has gotten up for a water break and doesn’t even spare a glance their way.

“Jeno,” Jaemin places a hand on Jeno’s knee. “Please, this is important. If it’s not important to you, it is to me.”

“Okay,” Jeno gulps down. “Not here, not anywhere near the company. Let’s go cycling tomorrow.”

Jaemin trusts that Jeno never goes back on his word. Not to Jaemin, he knows he can’t. So he gives his best reassuring smile and lets Jeno sweat his frustrations out.

***

They fight with their manager first thing in the morning. Usually the members wouldn’t be so insistent since the managers are generally subtle and don’t bother them unless they really have to when they are out together, but this time Jaemin stands his ground. “It’s not for any schedule or content, we’ll just go biking,” he says and the manager gives up with a shrug. They have to keep the balance. What doesn’t reach the upper up ears won’t hurt anybody, neither idols nor managers and they are all pretty good at keeping small, or the occasionally bigger, secrets.

The light drizzle is a blessing in disguise since the people out in the park are few and sparse. Their bikes do just fine in a bit of mud and soon they are by the river, pedalling leisurely, Jeno going way slower than he usually would.

“How about there?” Jeno almost comes to a stop, looking at a bunch of empty picnic tables, somewhat protected under thick trees.

Jaemin turns his bike instead of giving an answer and soon enough they are both sitting on opposite sides of a table, the damp wood just slightly less uncomfortable than the conversation that might follow.

He’s gathering his thoughts and trying to figure out how to start the conversation but Jeno seems to have things to take out of his chest.

“I think I’m gay,” he says, voice low. Jaemin seeks his hand to hold in the way he knows it can calm Jeno down.

“That’s—” he’s about to say ‘that’s okay, that’s very okay and we can talk it out,’ but Jeno keeps talking over him.

“That night before,” he takes a deep breath. “Before I asked if I could kiss you.”

“What happened the night before?” Jaemin remembers Jeno coming late from an individual schedule. He was tired but not moody like he could be at times. Said he spent some time practising alone at the company, had dinner with Renjun since the manager fetched the latter from his radio show and drove them home together. Then, way after midnight when Jaemin got off the couch Jeno asked him to stay in his room; nothing out of the ordinary.

“One of the trainees found me in the practice room,” Jeno’s leg starts going up and down, shaking the whole table. “I’ve been seeing her around a lot and she’s sweet so I figured talking for a bit wouldn’t hurt. She wanted to ask some things about choreography.”

“Did she kiss you?” Jaemin almost expects a negative answer, but something sparks in him. Something not being right, seeing how anxious Jeno is about this.

“Yeah,” Jeno looks down, at his hands, at Jaemin’s hands. “She didn’t ask, she just did it.”

“And?” Jaemin rubs Jeno’s knuckles with his thumb. “How was it?”

“I told her I’m not interested,” Jeno gives himself a small smile. “And then I completely freaked out.”

“Jeno, it’s okay,” he is not sure what to say or how to properly express his own thoughts. But he needs Jeno to know this; Jaemin is by his side as always, he’s there to comfort and to talk and just to offer a hug. He’s always there. “I don’t want to pressure you, or make you feel uncomfortable. I just want us both to be on the same page about this.”

“This,” Jeno muses, his expression pained. “I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Did you just want to try how kissing another boy feels?” Jaemin ask. He doesn’t know what he expects Jeno to say. Or if there’s something specific he wants to hear.

“Yes,” Jeno says, a little more confident. “I felt bad that night, you know. I should have been happy about my first kiss, but I was not.”

“You never asked for it, you didn’t want it,” Jaemin says, like some kind of kiss expert. As if Jeno wasn’t his very first kiss. “It shouldn’t be like that.”

“But you, I wanted to kiss you,” Jeno grows timid again and Jaemin hates the worry in his eyes. Jeno should have known by now that Jaemin would follow him to the end of the world and then some. “I wanted to kiss you for a long time.”

Jaemin freezes. His mind goes through all the implications of it. Of Jeno thinking about him, about kissing him.They both stay silent, watching the stray jogger or bicyclist, the leaves shaking, the few faraway boats.

“I don’t know if I’m straight,” Jaemin finally says. “Haven’t thought about it.” It’s a lie and Jeno, judging from the look he gives him, knows. But Jaemin doesn’t know how to explain and put a simple truth in words.

His co-workers are all men. His managers and choreographers and vocal trainers are mostly men too, with few staff exceptions. Every single out of work interaction with the opposite gender is a possible scandal. And at the same time all his comfort people, his closest friends of years are mostly men. Sure he thinks about them, maybe a little more than what could be considered appropriate, but at the same time it’s not like there are many healthier outlet options, not at that phase of his career, anyway.

“I don’t know what else to tell you,” Jeno lifts his legs up on the bench and retrieves his arm to hug his knees to his chest.

There’s a little selfish part in Jaemin. A little part that wants to keep Jeno close at all times, in all ways. He licks his lips, knowing that every single part of whatever they’re doing can backfire. “Do you like me?”

Jaemin counts the times his heart beats in the following moments of silence. Can almost hear Jeno’s too.

“I do,” Jeno smiles, his small, sad smile. Jaemin gives him a genuine one. Very suddenly, like a dam breaking, he can’t imagine a reality where he doesn’t like, love even, Jeno Lee back.

***

They are in the kitchen the second time it happens, everyone else out on one schedule or the other. Jeno is cooking a quick dinner and they have movie plans. Jaemin hasn’t stopped thinking of their time at the park a few days ago, hasn’t stopped thinking about it even for a moment.

He stares at Jeno and when he gets noticed, Jeno stares back at him. They don’t shy away from looking at each other and Jeno gives him a sweet smile. A smile that is a question, or an invitation. Jaemin doesn’t try to guess which one, he just steps closer to him, close enough to smell his shampoo as he hugs him tight, nosing on the short soft hair on Jeno’s nape.

Jeno giggles then, steadying himself with one hand on the counter, the other occupied with a spatula. Jaemin hasn’t thought this through. He just knows it’s right, knows it won’t put a strain in their relationship. Knows that if he doesn’t say what has been on his mind since that morning he woke up next to Jeno he is gonna have regrets.

“I really,” Jaemin takes a deep breath, feeling how Jeno tenses in his arms. “ _Really_ want to kiss you, Jeno.”

“Are you sure?” Jeno croaks, his eyes glued on the pan in front of him like it’s the most interesting object he’s seen his whole life.

“Look at me,” Jaemin brings his hand up to cup Jeno’s face, rub his thumb across his soft cheek. “I am sure if you are sure too.”

Jeno doesn’t answer and for a moment Jaemin thinks he’s about to shy away from him. Jeno kisses the pad of his thumb instead, takes Jaemin’s hand into his own and kisses his knuckles too. Jaemin feels so overwhelmed, feels like crying because he never thought a simple reality as beautiful as this could exist in the confines of their kitchen.

It’s warm in the apartment, but Jeno is even warmer, his body familiar to Jaemin, pliant, welcoming. When Jeno turns around Jaemin sees stars in his eyes, the happiness and excitement palpable in the air when they both lean in at the same time.

“Jeno,” Jaemin throws his hands around Jeno’s neck and messes his hair. “ _Jeno_.”

“What is it, baby?” Jeno smiles against Jaemin’s lips before he litters them with tiny soft pecks.

Jaemin laughs, burying his head in Jeno’s chest, letting Jeno hold him. “You called me baby,” his airy laugh turns giggly before it dies down.

“I—,” Jeno isn’t tense anymore, but Jaemin, even without looking up knows he’s blushing.

“I’m happy,” Jaemin decides. That’s the feeling bubbling into his chest, dulling down his exhaustion and his worries and his anxiety. Simple as that, _happiness_. “Call me baby all you want.”

They kiss again, slowly. They burn dinner, call Renjun to ask him to bring take out coming back, then kiss some more before Jisung is back and pressing the passcode in the door.

And afterwards, when all four of them are piled up on the living room couch watching a subpar action movie Jaemin is still thinking about Jeno, about leaving him breathless after kissing for too long. Wonders how long it will take before his roommate gets suspicious over him sneaking out to sleep at another room every night.

***

Jaemin, when he comes down from the highs of sneaking around with Jeno, expects the inevitable crash. The moment someone will find out, a manager, a choreographer, anyone with some kind of power over them. He waits for the moment Jeno will have enough of him and draw back, tell him it’s too risky, tell him they might tear down the friendship they already have, tell him they have to stop. Neither of those happens. Jaemin, foolishly so, starts feeling invincible, on top of the world when he’s pressed underneath Jeno in a bed too narrow for them both.

He hears the tell-tale laughter of Donghyuck before he materialises on his bedroom door, walking to Jaemin’s bed with long strides and pushing him to the wall.

“Hey sucker,” Jaemin kicks Donghyuck’s legs to retain some of his bed, those damn things taking up too much space. “It’s just me here today and I’m not feeling clownish enough to entertain you.”

“Is that so?” Donghyuck murmurs, wrapping his arms around Jaemin. “I’m not here to be entertained, love.”

“Came all the way from your dorm just to get on my nerves?” Jaemin cuddles Donghyuck back. The boy’s a portable heater and Jaemin takes full advantage of him in winter when Jeno’s not hogging him.

“I came on a mission,” Donghyuck fakes seriousness, his voices getting ridiculously low. “To defend the honor of our poor, scarred for life, innocent maknae.”

“Our what?” Jaemin laughs. “Last time I checked Jisungie could bench press you, I don’t think he needs any defending.”

“Sadly he knows how to bench press but he doesn’t know how to express his disgust at two horndogs making out against his bedroom door. I don’t know where we went wrong with him, seeing as none of our members has any base manners, he’s too timid for his own good.”

Jaemin takes a few seconds to register what Donghyuck had just said.

_Oh no._

“What did you just say?” Jaemin pretends he didn’t understand what Donghyuck uttered. And by extension what Jisung saw. And by another extension what Chenle already knows since Jisung shares every single thought he has with him through osmosis.

“I said,” Donghyuck pats Jaemin’s hair, his grin too wide to be good. “Jisungie saw his Jaemin hyung and his Jeno hyung making out against a door in that very dorm corridor.”

“But he…” Jaemin clearly remembers Jisung was out and didn’t come home until way later. “He was practising with Yuta that afternoon.”

“He was. Then practice ended and he came home. And you were too busy sucking face to even hear the door.” Donghyuck is still hugging him like an overzealous octopus, so at least Jaemin knows he isn’t totally disgusted and about to scold him...or something.

“Ugh,” he exhales. “I’m sorry, we—”

“Hey,” Donghyuck gets serious. “Don’t you panic on me, we’re all very happy for you. I just came here to tell you to be more careful and give my congratulations.”

“Happy for me?” Jaemin looks at Donghyuck. Why is Donghyuck happy to know Jaemin is messing around with a groupmate and best friend?

“Of course,” Donghyuck kisses his forehead. “It’s been what, two years now? Three?”

“Since...what?” The room is getting dark and it’s still too quiet in the house. Donghyuck leans in, like he has all the secrets to spare.

“Since you two have been crushing on each other, silly.”

“I did not have a c—” Jaemin starts to complain, because it’s not true and even if it was true Donghyuck wouldn’t have the right to know. Probably.

“You’re both helpless idiots,” Donghyuck pinches his cheek. “Don’t fuck this up.”

And just like that he’s off the bed, out of Jaemin’s room. Damned Lee Donghyuck and the uproar he causes wherever he goes. In the present case, in Jaemin’s head.

When the door opens a little later it’s Jeno and Chenle, back from playing basketball out in the freezing cold and somehow enjoying it. Jaemin enjoys Jeno in shorts though, so he even encourages his athleticism.

And even later, when Jisung is back too Jaemin makes small talk and everything seems to be normal. Jisung isn’t acting any kind of weird, even happy to show Jaemin one of the moves he recorded at practice. He’s not weird at all. Well, he sleeps on the floor sometimes and his taste buds are basically nonexistent so he’s not really _not_ not weird, in Jaemin’s opinion. But he doesn’t look scarred or anything. Chenle is his usual bratty ass too, so Jaemin concludes his and Jeno’s mishap in the corridor wasn’t as bad as it could have been and their group will go on for one more day.

***

The problem with Jaemin is that sometimes he doesn’t bother assessing his environment before sputtering whatever is on his mind when home. It seems to be the exact case on the dinner table, when he’s too exhausted and also tired of overthinking about Jeno and crushes and everything else Donghyuck implied.

“You have a crush on me?” He asks Jeno. “You _had_ a crush on me for years and didn’t tell me?”

Jeno’s hand stays on the air, mid chugging his cola. He puts his cup back down, slowly. “Yeah?” He looks perplexed.

It’s only when someone clears his throat that Jaemin realises Renjun is in the kitchen. Has been for quite some time, making tea. “You are _so_ dumb Na Jaemin,” he says. And then he’s gone to his room. With his tea.

Jaemin looks at Jeno again, on the opposed side of the table. “Yeah?”

"You organised that whole rooftop thing,” Jeno says. His voice is soft, but trembles at the edges, as if he’s scared. “I thought you liked me too.”

The rooftop thing. _Oh._

Jaemin didn’t know why he really did it back then. Well, he did know that Jeno is his dearest person and he wanted them to spend their lives together. Thought a grand gesture would be nice. Now he can see it under a different light...and it was not only the rooftop thing, was it? It was countless other moments —telling Jeno he loves him and meaning it a hundred percent and then some, spending evenings side by side on the bed, gaming or reading or chatting, knowing he wants to live with Jeno until he’s old and gray. Where was the line drawn? Did they step all over it with their first kiss, or way before?

“I need a moment,” he rubs his temples. “I am _thinking_.”

“Do you want me to leave?” Jeno, good-hearted, adorable Jeno. Jaemin takes his hands into his own, making sure he isn’t going anywhere.

He reaches the conclusion so easily he feels dumb for not coming to it before.

“Jeno Lee,” he presses his forehead on Jeno’s hands, suddenly too shy. “When you were busy having a crush on me I was busy falling in love with you.”

Renjun makes a gagging noise from somewhere in the apartment, but then Jeno is kissing him across the table and like that, the universe stays in balance.

***

As expected, after his first kiss a lot of firsts follow. Like the first time Chenle winks at Jaemin when he catches him checking Jeno out (in the basketball shorts). Like the first of going to an actual, very real date (disguised as a biking outing). Donghyuck and Renjun making fun of him isn’t a first, but now they are unstoppable. Jisung remains mostly passive and awkward with everyone and everything, so at least he remains something steady in Jaemin’s life.

The wonderful (in Jaemin’s opinion and he’s sure Jeno would very much agree) first they are going through at the very moment includes Jeno shirtless, pressing kisses on Jaemin’s stomach, keeping his hips pinned down as he squirms.

“Don’t be loud, baby,” Jeno looks up at him, all gentle crinkles, too soft for the occasion — the occasion of both of them being hard after making out for what feels like hours, that is. Everyone is home and Jaemin can pick their little noises apart — Renjun loitering in the living room, probably painting and Chenle gaming with Jisung, screaming into their mics.

“What are you gonna do about it?” Jaemin teases, choking back a moan because Jeno’s weight is on his groin and he is mouthing at _places_ and it’s on the verge of becoming too much. He’s not eager to let his groupmates hear him during personal activities, but he’s very, _very_ eager to rile Jeno up. “What are you gonna do to shut me up, Jeno?”

Jeno’s fingers are digging into his hip bones and he finds that kind of dull pain so good. He finds the sting of Jeno sinking his teeth into his skin even better. Knows it’s going to leave a mark, Jeno’s tongue lapping on the bite mark at Jaemin’s side. A little secret for the both of them.

“I’ve wanted to do this for too long,” Jeno mutters, mouth back against Jaemin’s navel. Their shirts have been discarded a while ago, but they’ve never gone further than that. Jaemin’s fingers thread through Jeno’s hair, a little plea to move. “Can I?”

Jeno has no business looking so good like that, innocent even, like he should have a halo above his head. Not when he’s trailing the hem of Jaemin’s boxers, nosing on his happy trail.

Jeno is waiting for an answer though, a clear one and all Jaemin manages is a string of “fuck” and “Jeno” and “yes” and then Jeno is pulling his boxers and shorts down, Jaemin feeling too cold and too exposed and self-conscious. Jeno has seen him naked before, not like _this_ , but naked nonetheless, so he knew what he’d have to work with beforehand.

“Fuck, are you sure?” Jaemin stops Jeno for a moment. It’s new territory and they haven’t been holding back, but he wants to do that, whatever is happening and everything else, he wants to do everything right. “You sure you want to do that?”

Jeno’s eyes focus and his gaze sombers, a small smile playing on his lips. “I wish you knew,” he kisses Jaemin’s thigh. “I wish you knew how many times I’ve jerked myself off in the shower thinking of you coming down my throat.”

Jaemin’s hand on Jeno’s hair stills and his cock twitches. He imagines Jeno under cold water, eyes closed and hand around his dick. Thinking of Jaemin. Coming because of Jaemin. He deflates back on the bed and he could swear he doesn’t remember being that hard and aching before. Not even when he fingered himself and rutted against his pillow, thinking of Jeno fucking him, not even then.

Jeno goes down on him like they have all the time in the world. Like there aren’t three more people in the apartment, like they won’t have to wake up and drag themselves to practice the next morning. He kisses Jaemin everywhere his lips can reach, opening up his legs slowly, keeping them wide even when Jaemin tries to instinctively shut them, shocked in the best way possible when he feels teeth grazing the inside of his thighs.

“You thought about this,” he messes Jeno’s hair, pulling slightly in the way Jeno loves when they make out.

“Yes,” Jeno licks his cock from the base to the tip and back down, slowly, his tongue warm and the saliva dripping down. He tries to not think about the awkwardness of having to do laundry again two days after the usual laundry day. Jeno helps wrapping his lips around Jaemin and suddenly all of his not-Jeno and not-Jeno’s-mouth thoughts magically disappear.

“You’re so good,” Jaemin heaves. He knows Jeno is too sloppy, a little asynchronous, but his eagerness makes up for all of it. Jaemin has never felt so good before, not with his bare hand, not under the shower spray, not with the lotion he keeps in his toiletries bag.

Jeno moans when he takes more of Jaemin into his mouth, deep and gravelly and Jaemin feels it all over his body. He feels Jeno’s teeth grazing his cock, only for a brief moment before he hollows his cheeks and all Jaemin can feel is Jeno’s mouth around him, Jeno’s tongue on his underside, Jeno’s hums, taking more and more of Jaemin.

“Does it feel good for you baby?” Jaemin asks, pulling Jeno up by the hair to get his attention. “Do you like it?”

“Damn, _yes,”_ there’s saliva and precum down Jeno’s chin and his sternum is gleaming with sweat. He’s too far for Jaemin to kiss, so he presses a finger on Jeno’s lips instead, then down his tongue when he opens up, lets Jeno suck around it, nibble at the pad.

“I fingered myself thinking of you once,” he says, not missing how Jeno’s hips buckle as he lets Jaemin’s digit fall off his mouth. “Came all over my bed,” he purrs and watches in amusement as Jeno lowers himself back down and breathes heavily on Jaemin’s cock. His hips buckle again and then he’s moving; taking Jaemin back into his mouth and rubbing himself on the bed at the same time.

“I’ll finger you next time,” Jeno says, taking a breath. His mouth is red and his hair is a mess making him look the best kind of ruined, the kind Jaemin wants to have on his bed every single night. He imagines how good Jeno’s big hand would feel pushing into him and he whimpers, feeling his cock leaking right onto Jeno’s tongue.

Jaemin wants to drag this out for as long as possible, wants Jeno’s mouth around him till the next morning, but he’s too worked up, too sensitive and already feels himself being close. He tells Jeno and all he gets back is a moan, tongue lapping on the vein of his pulsing cock too eagerly.

He gets too loud when he comes, he knows and he can’t help it, not when Jeno opens his mouth waiting, not when Jeno licks every last drop and his Adam's apple bobs as he swallows everything down.

And when Jaemin calms down enough to get a grasp of his surroundings again Jeno is still laying down, cheek pressed on Jaemin’s thigh, tongue half out of his mouth and his hips still moving against the sheets. He sounds delirious for a little moment, he sounds broken as he calls Jaemin’s name and then stills.

There is a long silence afterwards, their heavy breathing dying down and the rest of the dorm coming into existence again. Jaemin feels slugging, hand petting Jeno’s head absentmindedly.

“Come on,” he says, remembering how desperately Jeno was rutting on the bed. “Let’s take care of you.”

“It’s okay,” Jeno mutters, Jaemin pulling him up for a kiss.

“I want to make you feel good too,” Jaemin tells his lapful full of boy, kissing Jeno’s nose before diving down for his mouth, curious to taste himself like this.

“You did,” Jeno trails kisses on the side of Jaemin’s throat. That’s when Jaemin notices the stain on Jeno’s gray sweats. He doesn’t think when he reaches with a hand to touch Jeno, make sure it’s what he thinks it is.

“You came,” he muses, trailing the stain, deep and sticky and Jeno, even though he should be too sensitive, rubs against his palm. It’s nasty when he swipes Jeno’s come with a finger and brings it to his lips. It’s nasty when they kiss afterwards, too messy and wet. It’s outright _nasty_ when they give each other handjobs a little later too, but Jeno chants his name so sweetly that Jaemin wouldn’t have it any other way.

***

“They put up a fight with a manager because it’s their anniversary and they want to go to the park and do their disgusting couple things,” Jisung says after the aforementioned fight is over.

Jaemin is about to ask how Jisung knows that much when Chenle lifts a finger.

“The disgusting things don’t happen in the park, Jisung,” he points to Jeno’s room. “They happen right there.”

“Why are you talking like we aren’t _right_ here?” Jaemin asks, exasperated. He only wanted a quiet, nice, family breakfast. Jeno just shrugs and keeps eating his yoghurt against the counter.

“Why are you being loud in Jeno’s room like we aren’t in the house?” Renjun retorts, which elicits a half-scream from a panicked Jisung and a high-pitched laugh from Donghyuck who rushes to Renjun’s side to high five him.

“You are all unbelievable,” Jaemin shakes his head digging into the pancakes in the middle of the table (Kun’s recipe, Chenle’s attempt, not half bad). “I’m gonna get my own place and then you’ll see.”

“I’d like to see you try,” Donghyuck pats his back. “As if you could ever leave this mess, you’re too emotionally attached.”

“You know what?” Jaemin gets up, downing one last pancake bite on his way to leave his plate in the sink. “I’m taking my boyfriend,” he grabs Jeno’s sleeve. “And leaving.”

“Ah yes,” Renjun smiles. “We’ll miss you so much,” he coos. “Be careful with your boyfriend out there Jaeminnie.”

Chenle is about to open his mouth and say something, quite possibly absolutely dumb and unecessarily witty at the same time. Thankfully Jisung’s best friend powers sense it up and he slaps a hand on Chenle’s mouth, screaming bloody murder when Chenle licks his palm and escapes his hold.

Mark is still slumped on his chair, half engrossed in the task of finishing all the pancakes he hoarded on his plate, half resigned. He gives a smile and a thumbs up to Jaemin before they leave though, and that’s more than enough to get out of a sleep-deprived, coming straight from a night at the studio Mark.

On the pros of dating Jeno Lee, Jaemin’s stamina has wonderfully improved through biking. On the cons — well, there are no cons; Jeno Lee is just, really, _really_ good. Ridiculously so. Jaemin sometimes asks him how he can be so perfect, tracing lines on Jeno’s chest and feeling how it vibrates when his boyfriend starts giggling.

They get caught by other members a couple of times; receive an earful from Kun and Ten (very scary when teaming up) about how they should be careful. Then they burn some more dinners in favor of making out against the kitchen counter, just to give poor Jisung a bit of a fright every now and then and like this, life moves on.

Jaemin wonders if their first anniversary should practically be their third or fourth one. He almost shares the thought with Jeno. Then again, he thinks, he’s sure they’ll be together for so many years to come that they’d eventually lose count anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> You can find me [here](https://twitter.com/kuns_dimples)!


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